Top No-No's of Life

Here. Look at this, read this, memorize it. This is the bible of womanhood.

THE NO's that everyone Knows.

1. NEVER. EVER. wear a leopard leotard to the gym.
2. Don't wear a leotard.
3. VPL- rauchy!
4. FUPAs= gross!
5. Mom Jeans. (If it wasn't ok in the 90's, there's no way in HELL it's ok now!)
6. Drunk dialing your exes (NO NO NO!!!)
7. Saggy boobs. (Wear a bra. Seriously. It is not third grade)
8. Those..."bubble tops". Atrocious.
9. Non-layered bobs.
10. 80's haircuts.
11.Midriff is so 2001.
12. Muffin tops.
13. UGLY COUPLES.

Ok. I will intervene here. UGLY COUPLES (N)(pl)- two people who are dating who are both ugly.

Ugly couples should not go out in public. They should "have dinner and a movie" at home. All the time.
I mean...it's courtesy. No one wants to see an ugly person, and no one wants to see TWO ugly people holding hands. Sometimes it's endearing, sometimes it's gross. It depends on the type of ugly they are.

THE TYPES OF UGLY:

1. Ugly in that Cute Kind of Way
Someone who is Ugly in the Cute Kind of Way is ugly, but endearing. They are usually so awkward, they're precious, and you feel sorry for them. Like theatre kids. Most theater kids are ugly in the cute kind of way.

2. Ugly in the Pathetic Kind of Way
This person is gross. Enough said. They do not wear a bra, have a fupa, and need to go one a diet. They can help it. lol.

3. Plain Ugly.
They can't help it, so spare them the double-take and let them live their life. The plain ugly person is someone who is just born ugly. She has never had a boyfriend, and is 23 and has never kissed a guy. There is hope for her though. Maybe.

Any other bitchy things you want to say?? Let me know. Plus, I need a code name. Help me out.

- anonymous